((Deep Breath))

So I promised some details about Obama Care plans, but my brain can’t compute that right now, so you get my random thoughts instead:

Today, I went to the midwife for the last time before moving to Texas. The more I told her about my life at the moment, the more seemingly overwhelmed she got. Her eyes just kept widening:

“You are moving to America, with two kids and pregnant!? How are you going to do that?”

“Three. I have three kids.” I said sheepishly.

“Oh wow.  That flight is going to be fun. What is it 8 hours long?”

“Ten.” I bit my lip to choke back tears.  “And my daughter is under two, so she is on our lap the whole time.”

She stared at me like I’m crazy then shook her head. I told her I needed a nap.  She pointed at the kids and said, “That’s highly unlikely.”

Truth.

So instead,  I savoured the 90 seconds lying down while we listened to the lub dub lub dub of my baby’s heart beat.  That is such an amazing sound. I could listen to it forever except I couldn’t because my 21 month old started digging in the rubbish bin.

I took a deep breath and went about all the craziness that is my life at the moment. The good, the bad, and the ugly. The baby found a bouncy ball at the grocery store, threw it and chased it all over the store. It could have been a children’s book- rolling under shelves and under carts. She madly chased that ball, and I madly chased her. I hope her fast running gets her somewhere in life . . . like University.

I bought hotdogs for dinner as a quick crowd-pleaser. Baby girl was not impressed by my lack of effort. She began chucking bites of hotdog (with ketchup) all over the kitchen. The older two are cracking up, and I’m trying to manage the chaos. I can’t even tell the older two to stop encouraging her with their laughter because I’m finding myself delirious at the scene. Her little dead serious squishy face of protest and sweet little pigtails was the funniest juxtaposition. I wipe off the adjacent cabinet and decide it looks like a crime scene.

Seriously, my house looks like we have been robbed and ransacked.  Technology is missing, art is gone off the walls, tools litter the conservatory, and everything is out of place.  A friend came over to buy a bunch of things– and she walked away with almost all the storage containers in the house. Therefore, our stuff that used to be stored neatly in little boxes and baskets is now just strewn everywhere. I went to find bags today to put all the stuff in, but remembered, she bought the bag holder, too. I laughed out loud. What else can you do?

I was so happy yesterday when my 7 year old asked me to play Cinderella with her. Sweet deal, kiddo! Essentially, I got to yell at her to tidy up faster and more thoroughly, and she thought I was really in character.  That worked well until she informed me that Cinderella didn’t use the washing machine or the dishwasher. “She does stuff the old fashioned way, mum” meaning a bucket of soapy water in the garden.

So this morning, I got to clean up all the laundry and dishes that were “drying” in the sun. Hey Disney, could you put out a more modern Cinderella?  Cause that would be awesome.

She’s been listening to a lullaby CD at night that was unearthed when the CD basket was dumped out. I told her it sounded just like the spa. She sneered, “You listen to baby music at the spa?!” I giggled out loud. She put on her baby-spa music and sat cross-legged on the bed with her thumb and pointer finger in a circle.

“Shhh mom, I’m mem-it-tate-ting.”

“Ok honey, you do you.” I couldn’t bring myself to tell her it’s called meditating, but thought I should take a chapter out of her book and be still and quiet and pray for a while.

. . . I actually decided to watch TV instead. It’s our last night to have one, and someone might buy the couch tomorrow too, so I figured I’d better seize the opportunity.

But my husband is watching a TV show about gravity, but it’s too heavy for me (ha, get it?) I really want to eye-roll this deeply profound show and turn on something a bit more mind-numbing, but it is his birthday– so I’m trying to take a deep breath while listening to Neuton’s laws.

And that’s where my thoughts end today. I had a big, over-arching moral theme here I was working on and contemplating. It was about peace or hope or laughter or seizing the moment, or being okay with not being okay, but I’m too tired to figure out what I’m learning through all of it.

I think I’ll just lie down and close my eyes instead. I’ll blame it on the gravity.

be-love

PS (I’m reading this to my husband before I publish it. He is reviewing the mathematical formulas. Between the spa music from the other room and these equations, sleep should be no problem.)

 

 

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