Parent Win #2: Natural Consequences

I am passionate about equipping my kids to be as independent as possible, but gracious me, isn’t it easier to sometimes just do it for them? How do you balance natural consequences, independence, and actually getting somewhere on time?

Every day, my son whines and whinges about putting on his own shoes. They are velcro for goodness sake, but he can never find them, figure out which foot, buckle them– IRRK!


I hate to give in and fasten them for him, but somedays, I cannot spend 10 minutes arguing and I don’t have time for a naughty step. When I take away a toy or privilege, he becomes even more angry, running away from me furiously.

We have a circular house that connects the office, the staircase, the reception room, and the kitchen back to the office again.

There are four doors.

Evan’s favourite “I’m mad at you” protest is to run this circle, opening and slamming doors in succession. I’m always at least a door behind, out of breath, and have usually lost my temper when I catch up with him.

Not the cool, calm, in control parent that I  want to be am.

Go to your happy place, deep breath….




The day I had to sign the late book at school was such a dark day for me. If there was ever a punishment for the adult me, it is a permanent record that I failed to get to school by 8:55, followed by the statistics of how often that happened in a little chart at the end of the year.

Most days I want a trophy for all the hurdles I jumped to get 3 kids to school on time, especially when construction meant that our normal 8 minute commute turned into over an hour for five weeks, but no one applauds, so I silently pat myself on the back.


So what do you do? Put your kid’s shoes on or sign the late book?


I came up with a solution to the trainer (US=sneaker) dilemna. If I have to help my 4 year old with his shoes in the morning, when we get home, he has to go to his bedroom and he cannot come out until he has taken off and put on his shoes by himself.

If I am particularly frustrated, he has to do it twice.

Sometimes, he avoids doing this task for half an hour and plays by himself instead. On those days . . . I win, I win, I win. People ask when I have time to write at mommy2mummy. This post is brought to you by my son not putting  on his shoes!

lmmphotography-8My next project is the four year old doing his own carseat buckle.

How much of my life is spent buckling carseats?

If I had a genie in a bottle, I’d ask for self buckling seatbelts and self buckling shoes.

I got a waste disposal last Christmas. #motherhood

Can’t we just go barefoot?



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